NBDE-I

Exactly a month and a half... NBDE I .. wat i always wanted to do ,.. so im so close to finally appearing for it , am i prepared .. ? i dont know , i am not even sure i will feel totally prepared on d day of d exam , there jus seems so mch to learn , and know , understand , well yes its just basic sciences and II wud be more .. leaving dat aside .. i am not stressed , in a way happy , there came a point when i thot i wud never be able to give dis exam and it looked like a distant dream , but now i feel im inching closer to d dream , and it feels gud ... i am wrking hard , have been in d past 4 mths or so , there hve been days when im frustrated abt still studying and feel that im not goin to make it , there r occassional times of self doubt ,but who duznt hve those moments ... there hve been times when i felt im not doing enuf justice to my studies and mebbe havnt been either .. when i feel low , depressed and totally beaten up , and sick to d core for having to study while ppl my age are doing diff things ,.. but .. its NBDE I ... wat i wanted to do ever since i graduated outve collg ...

I pray really hard tday for d lords up there to listen to me dis once ....

Its all good :)

An old phrase -- happiness is our own state of mind , how many times have i not heard it or read it , and mulled over it and still , still failed to un derstand that happiness is nothing but our own state of mind , a dear old frnd of mine once said to me that it all begins and ends in the mind , and all so true aint it ... it really duz , we mould our own lives , our own sorrows and our joys , its us and noone else who is responsible for the kind of lives we have , there are prolly n no. of books written on the power of d mind , how to use it as the best tool and how not to let it ruin us , nope im not going to put down any hi fundas , cos i donno any hi fundas in d 1st place , but dis is what i do know .. we ruin ourselves by our own thought process , and if somehow we could learn to make that thought process as positive as ever , it would bloom into happiness , instead of seeing situations as hurdles and cursing fate and life and all that , wouldnt it be a better idea to see situations as d best ways in which life cud be at that time ? understanding at every point that a higher authority is a fine player and the best director ever and He does have a master plan and that master plan is all in our favor , whatever we r in.. is what is going to lead us to that favorable master plan , there is jus no bad ... bad is d word we shud eliminate from our dictionaries , cos when every thing is actually leading us to what has been destined for us , then how can any of it be bad ?

well yes , ask me ... how do u explain ppl who have fatal diseases ,ppl losing loved ones , infidelity ,broken marriages, poverty and all that suffering we see on a daily basis ... is that also His master plan ... yes , for that person in that situation it so is ... cos its there to lead them to higher state of awareness ... i know dis for a certainity ... cos i don belive anymore that this is where it all ends , i belive i am a traveller , who has had a long stopover on planet earth , and the journey is still very long .. what i gain from here is what is goin to help in my journey ...dis life is jus a small part of it ...

...smell d coffee , taste the chocolate .. no matter how it looks .. its all good :)